I Kissed a Guy
by Synonymous Brian
Summary: In which Raito confesses his doings with L to the Task Force through a modified pop song. Parody of "I Kissed a Girl" by Katy Perry. CRACK. MAJOR OOCNESS. LxRaito


**Warnings: Silliness, MAJOR OOCness, especially on Raito's part, crackish, light yaoiness… You get the idea XD**

**A/N: Hey everybody! Well, I happened to be listening to the radio the other day, and a song came up, known as, "I Kissed a Girl" by Katy Perry, and I thought, 'I would love this song if it was sung by a guy and called "I Kissed a Guy" or something' and thus, I changed the a couple of the lyrics to fit LxRaito and voila! This short, kinda dumb one-shot was born! XD**

**Anyways, if you hadn't heard the song before, I suggest you go to YouTube now and search it up, just so you know how the tune goes XD**

**Disclaimer: -drones in bored tone- No I don't own Death Note, that goes to Tsugumi Ohba and Takeshi Obata and I don't own the song 'I Kissed a Girl' which belongs to Katy Perry and whoever else took part in it's making. (I do however, own 'I Kissed a Guy')**

**Read and (hopefully) enjoy!**

_**xxx**_

It was just another day at task force headquarters. Everybody was working hard at their computers save Aiber and Wedy who lounged on the couches, smoking cigarettes. Misa had come down to visit and had pulled up a chair next to Raito's and was babbling away in third person.

"Everybody," Raito suddenly stood up, capturing the eyes of every member in the room, "I think it's time I confessed."

"You're Kira?" L asked excitedly.

Raito shot him a glare, "No, and I shall be confessing…" he suddenly seemed to have grabbed a microphone out of thin air, "By song."

"Woot! Yeah! Go Raito!" Misa cheered.

L narrowed his eyes at the younger boy, "Raito-kun this is hardly appropriate, we should be working on the case. This out burst only increases my suspicion by-"

But the auburn haired boy cut across him, shouting, "Hit it Watari!" And suddenly, a loud, catchy beat filled the main room as Raito began to shift his hips in time with the tune, singing,

"_This was never the way I planned _

_Not my intention_"

"Raito-kun, this is ridiculous!"

"_Cant help my feelings for you _

_This crazy attraction"_ at this Raito had tossed his head in L's direction and threw him a flirty wink.

"What is the meaning of this Raito-kun? Stop this foolishness!" L cried, trying to hide the spreading blush across his face while the rest of the task force and Misa stared in shock.

"_It's not what, I'm used to_

_Chained together far too long_

_Can't blame it on hormones_

_Caught my attentiiiooonnn!"_ the boy sang, dragging out the last syllable.

"Raito-kun…"

"_I kissed a guy and I liked it!"_

"Raito!"

"Ehhh? Does this mean Misa's Raito is gay?"

"Raito-kun, we have been chained together 24/7, don't you think I would have noticed if you had kissed a male!?"

"_The taste of his sweet, sweet full lips_

_I kissed a guy, couldn't help it_

_I hope my girlfriend won't mind it"_ Raito continued to sing and dance provocatively, ignoring all the comments.

"Of course Misa-Misa minds it!"

"_It was so wrong_

_It felt so right_

_Don't mean I'm in love tonight_

_I kissed a guy and I liked it_

_I liked it!"_ he sang loudly.

"This is utterly absurd Raito-kun, we are wasting valuable time on the case! If you wish to come out of the closet, do it in a way that does not involve singing… or dancing! Raito-kun!"

"_No, I don't even know your name_

_It doesn't matter"_

"If Raito-kun is singing about me, then I assure him that I don't feel the same way!"

"_You make me use an alias_

_While we play this game"_

"Son, Ryuuzaki's right, this is inappropriate for work! Raito!"

"_It's not what, I should do_

_Not Kira anyways_

_My head gets so confused_

_Hard to obeeeeyyyy!"_ Raito sang long and hard.

"Raito-kun, if you do not stop it this instant, I shall be forced to use physical force to stop you!" L shouted, but the brunette just shot him a rather alluring look that plainly said, 'Go ahead,' before singing again.

"_I kissed a guy and I liked it_

_The world's three best detectives_

_I kissed a guy, I can't deny it_

_Though it rose my Kira percentage."_

"Raito! Misa can't believe you cheated her! And with Ryuuzaki too! How dare you!"

"So this is about me! Raito-kun, I suggest you stop your flirting and teasing and get back to work! We have never kissed and I have no feelings of that kind towards you!"

"_It was so wrong_

_It felt so right_

_Does this mean I'm in love tonight?_

_I kissed a guy and I liked it_

_I liked it!" _

"Are you quite done, Raito-kun?" L asked, but just then the younger boy started up again, a slightly slower verse.

"_This chain between us is far too long_

_Soft skin, nice ass, so touchable!"_

"_Excuse me_ Raito-kun?" L shrieked, eyes wide, blushing like crazy as Raito just tossed him another wink.

"No! It's all over! Misa's Raito is gay! Nooooooo!"

"Raito! You are going to be grounded for a week! Raito! Stop!"

"_Hard to resist so lovable_

_His fetish! For bondage!_

_And food play too gets to my heeeeaaaad!"_ Raito dragged the microphone along his face and neck, trying to appear enticing.

"Okay, that's it," Souichiro said angrily, standing up and grabbing the microphone away from his bright eyed son. But it was no use, for he simply sang even louder than before.

"_I kissed a guy and I liked it!_

_The taste of that strawberry shortca-"_

L had quickly grabbed the brown haired suspect by the arm and clamped a hand over his mouth; effectively shutting him up, "You will stop this nonsense right now, Raito-kunaaahh!" the raven locked insomniac suddenly released his hold on the younger boy staring at his hand as if it was infected, "You just licked my hand!" Raito smirked seductively, grabbing the microphone from his seemingly shocked father, flipped his perfect strands of auburn and continued.

"_I kissed a guy, couldn't help it_

_I hope the task force don't mind it"_

"..."

"_It's just so wrong_

_But it felt so right_

_Can't help I'm in love tonight_

_I kissed a guy and I liked it_

_Hell, I loved it!"_ Raito finished with a flourish and bowed to his mini audience, who weren't even clapping, "Thank you, thank you! I know I'm awesome!"

Cue outbreak of nervous giggling from Matsuda. Misa was sobbing. Mogi remained silent as usual and returned to work. Aizawa just rolled his eyes, muttering something about flaming, rabid homosexuals. Aiber and Wedy seemed to not care. Souichiro was both in shock and anger at the same time. And L… L was absolutely livid, although nobody could tell if the redness of his usually pale and stoic face was from anger or if he was just blushing.

"Raito-kun, what was the point of that incredibly inappropriate song, exactly?" L ground out, glaring at the younger boy.

Raito grinned, "To confess my secrets to the world!"

"What secrets?!" L demanded, furious.

"Didn't you hear?"

"I think everybody heard! And these so called secrets never happened!"

"Yes they have!" exclaimed the Kira suspect.

L sighed frustratedly, "Raito-kun, I don't know if this is some silly joke of yours, but we have not-mmph!" And of course, Raito had grabbed the collar of L's white shirt and practically smashed their mouths together.

L pushed the bronze eyed boy away roughly after about two seconds, appearing rather disturbed as he eyed the rest of the investigation team who seemed to be staring at the chained duo in shock. Raito suddenly looked nervous, as if finally aware that his beloved Ryuuzaki might not feel the same way, "Erm, now we kissed?" he squeaked.

"Ahem," L gave a tiny cough to the rest of the Task Force before quickly grabbing Raito's arm and dragging him up the stairs to the nearest broom closet/bathroom/bedroom as fast as possible.

_**xxx**_

**A/N: Well? How was it? Good? Bad? Funny? Weird? Eyes bleeding making? XD Constructive Criticism is always apprecieated! Just no flaming! **

**REVIEW!! XD**


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